WOULD YOU STILL CATCH ME IF I FALL?

Me
© Sabrina
Can’t you see
The pain in my eyes?
But this is me
And my life.
If you hold me close
You can hear my heart
It cries more than most
From being torn apart.
After every breath I take,
After every fight I witness,
I ask “why must I awake?”
Will I ever conquer forgiveness?
Can you ever truly
Forgive without forgetting?
I am lonely.
My life I am abandoning.
From pain I am running.
Even though these tears are streaming
I will never look back.
All in all,
I have one question to ask.
Would you still catch me if I fall?
Maybe one day you will see.
This is how I live,
And this is me.

Comments

Imperfect Change

It doesn't look like much, I know. However, I feel like I have achieved something today. I haven't worn a jean skirt in the last 3 years, but today I wore one. I've been staring at this skirt for weeks in my bag but today I stood up, picked it up and wore it. I didn't do much thinking about it. I didn't look in the mirror to see what it looks like. I just wore anyhow. We all have those things we have refused to do for one silly reason or the other and some for no reason at all. We know we need to change but we're waiting for the time we think we'll be ready for the change. And the fact is, we'll never be truly ready to make the required change. We don't have to be ready, we just have to make the change anyhow we can. We have to grab the change at the neck and make it anyway. Just like this skirt looks one me, when the change is made, we'll be imperfect at first but then the change has occurred anyway. Your first attempt at doing that n...

I Blame Myself

One empath struggle I constantly battle with is always feeling responsible for how I am treated by others. When someone does or says something hurtful to me, my first thought is that I caused it. "If I had respected myself enough to establish boundaries, X wouldn't have had the audacity to do this" "If I had worked harder on my career, I wouldn't be here to receive X treatment" The crazy list goes on... Once in a while I speak up immediately but most of the time I blame myself. I always expect more from myself and feel I shouldn't have put myself in a position to be hurt. Writing about it now makes me realize how hard I am on myself. It just doesn't make sense to be hard on the one person that you have. The one who's been with you true thick and thin - YOURSELF. How hard can it be to be kind to yourself?

HOLD ON

I almost gave up, thinking I couldn’t take life anymore, but I heard a voice telling me to be still. There’ve been days when I fell so sick, so sick that I felt like it was the end. So sick that I wondered why I was brought to this earth in the first place. So sick that I couldn’t breathe, so sick I was ready to give up but He told me to hang on. There’ve been days when depression weighed me down. I felt I had no reason to be happy. I felt that life wasn’t working as it should. I felt like I had had enough of life, family and friends. I felt like dying (if only dying was the solution to depression). I felt so out of this world. I began to wonder if someone was really up there or whether I was the one being so insane to think that there was a big man living in the sky and controlling the earth. Because if there was really someone up there, all these bad things wouldn’t have happened. She wouldn’t have died, I wouldn’t have had a blocked chest….. She wouldn’t have died just like that...

Parle with Sina

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